(部分翻译仅凭个人感觉,我从未闹明白处女贞操有什么大不了

女权主义者的性欲观(读书笔记:杰茜卡瓦伦蒂:《正面全裸的女权主义》)我一直以为,女权主义者都是些身穿男性西装剪着男人发型叼着香烟不刮腋毛的中性人,直到读了瓦伦蒂这本《正面全裸的女权主义》。现在才明白过来,原来女权主义者也是有七情六欲的!不仅如此,她们的欲望比普通女性更直白,更强势,更利己。瓦伦蒂用了整整一个章节来阐述女权主义的性欲观。标题是《女权主义者更擅长干那事(以及其它关于性的提示)FEMINISTS
DO IT BETTER (AND OTHER SEX
TIPS)》。她开宗明义就自我标榜“我在床上比你行,而这得归功于女权主义。”(I’m
better in bed than you are. And I have feminism to thank for
it.)现代男权社会对女人有一种自相矛盾的双重标准:一方面,女人在白天接受“守贞教育”,晚上则在电视上看到“女孩也疯狂”的广告。一方面,女孩被教导说婚前性行为是不对的,另一方面又告诉你,你若想成为一名春假辣妹,你赶紧对着镜头宽衣解带吧!(When
you’re getting abstinence-only education during the day and Girls Gone
Wild commercials at night, it’s not exactly easy to develop a healthy
sexuality. You’re taught that sex before marriage is bad bad bad, but
that if you want to be a springbreak hottie, you’d better start making
out for the
camera.)守贞教育家是这么来教育女孩子的:“你们的身体就是一根棒棒糖。当你们与男人发生性关系时,他剥去你的糖衣,含吮起来。当时可能感觉不错,可遗憾的是,他与你完事后,你们留给下一位伴侣的就是衣冠不整,口水臭味的残渣。”(“Your
body is a wrapped lollipop. When you have sex with a man, he unwraps
your lollipop and sucks on it. It may feel great at the time, but
unfortunately, when he’s done with you, all you have left for your next
partner is a poorly wrapped, saliva-fouled sucker.
“)够耸人听闻的。不过女权主义者不吃这一套。瓦伦蒂提出的口号是:“我的处女膜我做主!(Our
Hymens, Ourselves
)”她说:“我从未闹明白处女贞操有什么大不了,真的。我的贞操在中学时代就被一名男朋友没怎么费劲就夺去了。我们后来还约会了好几年呢。我还以为会有什么异样的感觉呢,没有。我总觉得这种把处女贞操当成如花似玉一回事很愚蠢。所以你可以想象,当我发现自己原来是被用过即弃的垃圾时有多愕然。”(I
have never really understood what the big deal was about virginity.
Really. Mine was lost without a great deal of fanfare to a high school
boyfriend whom I dated for several years afterward. I expected to feel
different—I didn’t. The whole precious-flower-virginity thing always
seemed silly to me. So imagine my surprise when I found out that I was
just a used-up piece of trash without
it.)我比较纳闷的是,女权主义者总体上是鄙夷男人的。可是在处理自己的情欲时,她们对男人的态度显然又是另一番风景。诚然,她们与男人上床,再也不是为了讨好男人,更不是为了繁衍后代,而纯粹是为了自己的愉悦。用瓦伦蒂露骨的话,就是:一边做女权主义者,一边啪啪啪!(f***ing
while feminist
!)只是,面对一位性欲如此高涨态度如此强势的女权主义床伴,哪一位小男人消受得起?

现代男权社会对女人有一种自相矛盾的双重标准:一方面,女人在白天接受“守贞教育”,晚上则在电视上看到“女孩也疯狂”的广告。一方面,女孩被教导说婚前性行为是不对的,另一方面又告诉你,你若想成为一名春假辣妹,你赶紧对着镜头宽衣解带吧!(When
you’re getting abstinence-only education during the day and Girls Gone
Wild commercials at night, it’s not exactly easy to develop a healthy
sexuality. You’re taught that sex before marriage is bad bad bad, but
that if you want to be a springbreak hottie, you’d better start making
out for the camera.)

Now that my desire to succeed has given way to a desire to help others
succeed, that’s become my current struggle. It’s now clear to me that my
purpose, your purpose, and the purpose of everything else is to evolve
and to contribute to evolution in some small way.I didn’t think about
that at the start; I just went after the things I wanted. But along the
way I evolved, and now I am sharing these principles with you to help
you evolve too.I realized that passing on knowledge is like passing on
DNA—it is more important than the individual, because it lives way
beyond the individual’s life. This is my attempt to help you succeed by
passing along to you what I learned about how to struggle well—or, at
the very least, to help you get the most out of each unit of effort you
put in.

About that Indian boy,I know him earlier than you.So it happened long
time ago.And if you don’t like Indian people ,I won’t talk with any
Indian people.It is not a big deal.I respect you.

First is economics. Depends on the common theory of economics. All the
discrimination in recruitment is just unbalance between requirements and
supplements. It means 300 thousands.  graduates Just 30 jobs vacancies.
Its like if you show love to the goddess but be refused. It’s so common.
Goddess just only one. However your competitors are too more.

”她说:“我从未闹明白处女贞操有什么大不了,真的。我的贞操在中学时代就被一名男朋友没怎么费劲就夺去了。我们后来还约会了好几年呢。我还以为会有什么异样的感觉呢,没有。我总觉得这种把处女贞操当成如花似玉一回事很愚蠢。所以你可以想象,当我发现自己原来是被用过即弃的垃圾(或棒棒糖)时有多愕然。”(I
have never really understood what the big deal was about virginity.
Really. Mine was lost without a great deal of fanfare to a high school
boyfriend whom I dated for several years afterward. I expected to feel
different—I didn’t. The whole precious-flower-virginity thing always
seemed silly to me. So imagine my surprise when I found out that I was
just a used-up piece of trash (or candy) without it.)

I realized that reality was, if not perfect, at least what we are given
to deal with, so that any problems or frustrations I had with it were
more productively directed to dealing with them effectively than
complaining about them. I came to understand that my encounters were
tests of my character and creativity. Over time, I came to appreciate
what a tiny and short-lived part of that remarkable system I am, and how
it’s both good for me and good for the system for me to know how to
interact with it well.

Then I’m going to tell you those men who said love me.Indeed they said
that ,but it is ture or not is quite a different matter.I’m not
interested in them.

Second is history. Elite university found great job, and non-elite
university was refused.those poor guys didn’t get great better career
path, really?  Let’s look at this picture. Ten years ago, most graduates
from 985 211 got the offer of ericson a famous international mobile
phone enterprise. It’s champagne in the international position. Like
apple today. But the other graduates not in 985.211 entered alibaba
which main business is selling shoots. Times went on. Alobaba is an
ideal company. Now all the 985 211 joined BAT, you are refused. It
doesn’t mean you are loser. You also have the chance to live better. I
remember one sentences. Nothing is so bad but might be a blessing. it’s
wisdom. So Embrace discrimination is what we can do best.

我一直以为,女权主义者都是些身穿男性西装剪着男人发型叼着香烟不刮腋毛的中性人,直到读了瓦伦蒂这本《正面全裸的女权主义》。

The more I played it, the better I got at it, the less painful those
situations became, and the more rewarding the process of reflecting,
developing principles, and then getting rewards for using those
principles became.I learned to love my struggles, which I suppose is a
healthy perspective to have, like learning to love exercising (which I
haven’t managed to do yet).

Now I am going to say a long story about me.I really hope you could
read it.

I did some research to persuade myself. Then I found It’s no need to
have these negative feelings. Be refused by Discrimination is a common
thing. If we embrace discrimination. We’ll live better. i will share
with you three books.

现在才明白过来,原来女权主义者也是有七情六欲的!不仅如此,她们的欲望比普通女性更直白,更强势,更利己。

Watching the same things happen again and again, I began to see
reality as a gorgeous perpetual motion machine, in which causes become
effects that become causes of new effects, and so on.

You are a doctor.you must know the technical term”avoidant
attachment
“.I am this type.I do want to be loved and a
relationship.But I don’t have any confidence. I don’t know how to love
people expecially in a relationship. I can’t overcome my personality
defects
.So I think people like this would better to be
single,otherwise both will be hurt.I do like you,but I just can’t fall
in love  you .
That is my problem.I don’t know how to love people.I
have no ability to deal with relationship well.

Dear fellow toaster masters. How many times your resume was rejected?
What’s the main reason? Several months ago. After paying my tmc fees. I
have no money to buy something on November 11. my poor pockets. And  So
i made a big decision. Change the job. Then i refreshed resume. Borrowed
technical books. One day i Received an interview call. The lady said. Do
you want to change your job? I said. Yes. Can you tell me your excepted
salary? So open. I like. You must know the standards. So you made. When
i heart the salary i wes suprised. Then pretend so calm to answer any
questions. In the end. He Said: last but not least. When will you want a
baby? So straight. I don’t like now. Maybe this year. Then we close this
interview conversation as soon as possible. after that. All the
interviews were interrupted by the same question.

守贞教育家是这么来教育女孩子的:“你们的身体就是一根棒棒糖。当你们与男人发生性关系时,他剥去你的糖衣,含吮起来。当时可能感觉不错,可遗憾的是,他与你完事后,你们留给下一位伴侣的就是衣冠不整,口水臭味的残渣。”(“Your
body is a wrapped lollipop. When you have sex with a man, he unwraps
your lollipop and sucks on it. It may feel great at the time, but
unfortunately, when he’s done with you, all you have left for your next
partner is a poorly wrapped, saliva-fouled sucker. “)

(看着同样的事情一次又一次地发生,我开始把现实看成是一个华丽的永动机,其中的原因变成了影响成为新效果的因素,等等。大概是
a产生b,b又产生了c)

I am regret very much about what I said that night.I shouldn’t say
that.I won’t do sex with all of the men.I don’t have the courage to
take a risk of suffering AIDS or STD .I was stimulated so I said a lot
of messy words.It must hurt you.Sorry.

Third is psychology. What if you are Human Resources. What if you need
select 30 best from 300 thousands graduates quickly? Maybe you have the
same solution. In order to choose the best. So if you are refused. Just
means you are not best. No discrimination. It’s just a rule. Have you
ever doubt your abilities when you are refused? It’s not excellent is
true. But we should comfort ourselves like a great friend. Not too harsh
and strict.Then we became confident to embrace discrimination. We will
be rational to deal anything. Trust ourselves. yes we can. If you
Failed.just try one more time. Like me never get best prepared speaker
in our club. But I insist on trying. Maybe in the future I will will be
the best. It doesn’t matter. Trying one more time can make me more
brave.  growth needs try one more time. Maybe you will reach your goal. 
Like yuminhong. 25 times worst loving experience. 3 times failures in
college entrance examinations. But embrace discrimination made him
entering peak university. And be the CEO of Xindongfang. We can say.
Dream it. And get it. Un

她开宗明义就自我标榜“我在床上比你行,而这得归功于女权主义。”(I’m better
in bed than you are. And I have feminism to thank for it.)

Having the basics—a good bed to sleep in, good relationships, good
food, and good sex—is most important, and those things don’t get much
better when you have a lot ofmoney or much worse when you have less.


I was angry. Depressed for a long time. Then I found It was so common in
any recruitment information. We were refused Again and again. The Human
Resources said. We need have a famous university education background.
985 211 postgraduate or doctors.  They said. You never met female
engineers. All right? So sorry.they also said we dont need male nurse.
So sorry. Too fat. So ugly of your resume. We need long leg.all the bias
keep some excellent person out the door. Then they are depressed and not
confident even they begin to doubt their abilities.ba afraid of trying
one more time. Did you have the same feelings before?

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